Self-Coaching for the Soul: How to Think, Feel, and Grow Through Life’s Hardest Moments
The episode features Lesa Koski and her coach, Tracy Pleschourt, discussing the transformative power of self-coaching, especially in times of adversity. Tracy introduces her 'Self-Made You' goal planner, designed to help individuals manage their time, emotions, and actions towards achieving their goals. The host shares her personal journey of overcoming a significant health scare, emphasizing the importance of feeling one's emotions and the value of self-coaching and spiritual faith. They underline the distinction between pain and suffering and stress the importance of investing in oneself to lead a more abundant life.
00:00 Introduction and Warm Welcome
00:20 Meet Tracy Plushcourt: Coach and Friend
01:28 The Goal Planner: A Tool for Success
04:15 Understanding Pain and Suffering
08:36 The Power of Self-Coaching
16:34 Seeking Professional Help
17:19 The Challenge of Self-Coaching
17:45 Personal Struggles and Rest
18:59 Rediscovering Passions and Dreams
19:11 The Role of Self-Coaching and Other Resources
20:30 Defining Self-Coaching
22:42 The Importance of Self-Coaching Skills
24:02 The Impact of Self-Coaching on Personal Growth
27:31 Practical Applications of Self-Coaching
32:58 The Journey of Becoming Self-Made
33:25 Conclusion and Final Thoughts
Get your goal planner here!
Transcript
Welcome listeners.
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:I'm super excited to have you here today.
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:I am wearing my whimsy sweatshirt
because I am like off the high of
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:spending three days with Bob Goff,
and if you don't know who he is,
5
:look him up because he's amazing and.
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:He's inspiring and he makes you
feel loved and it's super fun.
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:And then I get to, I flew in last night
from San Diego and here I am sitting
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:across my screen from me is my dear
friend, my coach Tracy Plush court.
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:Tracy, you were here.
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:I mean, you've been here
through it all, right?
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:Yeah.
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:Like you've been through me going
through a really hard thing.
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:You've been here through fun things.
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:Yeah.
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:And you were here for the beginning.
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:You were the one I threw on
this podcast when I was kind
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:of going through hard things.
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:And we talked a lot in those
episodes, which I just wanna
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:touch on this, Tracy, so just.
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:Listeners, welcome.
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:Here's Tracy.
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:If you need coaching, go to Self-Made You.
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:We'll have her info,
info in the show notes.
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:She also has this amazing
calendar, and if you go back to
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:the beginning of Saddle Up Live.
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:We talk about schedules and how
they're so important and they
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:still, still are so important to me.
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:And we may talk about that a
little bit later, but just throw
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:in a little information about that
calendar book that you've got out.
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:Speaker 2: Yeah.
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:So, uh, well, thank you for having me.
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:It's yes back.
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:Uh, uh.
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:Since we last met, we launched
a goal planner that really holds
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:your hand through the day in
and day out progress towards.
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:The goals that are most important to you.
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:So the book is just a very organized
way of, number one, deciding what
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:it is that you want from your life.
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:So we kind of reverse architect it
and we look at what area of your life
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:are you least satisfied with and why.
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:And then that really launches
us into setting some goals.
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:And then we take those goals and we
dissect what we would have to do.
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:From an action standpoint to
make progress towards those goals
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:over the course of three months.
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:So the book itself holds, um.
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:What would that be?
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:90 days of, um, planning
towards your goal.
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:And I have a method to
kind of the madness.
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:It's not all about actions.
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:Most people will think about a goal
planner or a day planner as like time
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:management or project management.
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:And I look at this planner as not only.
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:Time management, but mental management.
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:Mm-hmm.
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:Like mental and emotional management,
because if you don't have that
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:component locked in, nothing that you
do is gonna be sustainable and it's
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:surely not going to be something that
feels good while you're doing it.
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:And that's the goal of life.
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:Mm-hmm.
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:Is just be present enough to say, do I
actually enjoy what it is that I'm doing?
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:Including making progress
towards my goals.
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:So this has just become, the book
itself is just a labor of love that
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:has finally come to market that holds
people's hand through the day in and
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:day out process of achieving your goals.
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:I have heard hundreds, if
not thousands of people say.
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:I always set them.
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:I'm really good at setting 'em.
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:Mm-hmm.
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:I never achieve them.
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:Speaker: Yep.
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:Speaker 2: And this puts a stop to that.
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:Speaker: And you know, listeners, we
all have dreams, we all have goals.
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:I mean, I don't care if it's something
that you think is silly and small,
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:um, don't go by what this world says.
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:Just, you know, pick what is it You
want more time with your grandkids.
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:This will will help you figure it out.
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:And you know what I meant
to say in the beginning?
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:You know, I'm so smooth here.
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:As I meant to say that we're gonna kind
of talk today and I think I'm actually
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:gonna use this on doing divorce different
and saddle up live because we're
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:gonna talk about how you get through.
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:A really hard time, like a really
hard time, something difficult.
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:It can be divorce, it can be a
diagnosis, it can be your dog dying.
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:It can be like a really, or a
spouse dying or whatever it is.
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:And what I just have to say, Tracy, is
I wanted you to talk about your calendar
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:because I think because of the work that
I did with Tracy before I had my Super
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:Heart event and my little trauma, um.
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:It helped me through it.
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:And Tracy, I was always someone
that didn't want anyone to suffer.
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:Oh, I just wanna make
it all better for you.
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:I don't want you to feel bad.
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:And my poor children, right?
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:I mean, I, you know, they need
therapy probably and coaching right
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:now because I tried to keep them
protected from ever being hurt.
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:And what I'm realizing is.
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:That's kind of where the good stuff is.
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:Speaker 3: Mm-hmm.
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:Speaker: And so we can't, we can't
like completely stop the bad some
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:of the suffering like, but we
can help it along the way as long
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:as we look at it and feel it.
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:Is that making sense to you, trace?
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:Speaker 2: Yeah.
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:And I have so much to say
about this because like.
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:Allowing yourself to feel the quote
unquote bad feelings is where the
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:good stuff is to use your words.
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:Mm-hmm.
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:Learn so much from it.
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:And let's just categorize the
bad feelings as pain, right?
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:Yeah.
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:We all have pain in our life, and the
difference between pain and suffering is
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:pain is what we learn from suffering is.
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:When we make the pain mean
something about our worth, when
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:we really start to like, ooh.
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:Tell ourselves that I shouldn't be angry.
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:I shouldn't be feeling sad.
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:I shouldn't let anybody else feel
angry or sad or disappointed, like
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:we make it mean something about our.
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:Worth.
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:And that's where the
suffering actually comes in.
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:And that's what I help people
avoid is the unnecessary suffering.
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:Speaker: I love that.
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:I love how you just worded that and it
was an aha light bulb moment for me.
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:I still get 'em.
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:I'm still growing right
along with everyone.
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:So I love that because, and here's
the thing, when I went through
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:my hard thing, I felt the pain.
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:But I, I, I don't think I suffered
trace, I think because, but it hurt.
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:Mm-hmm.
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:It hurt and it was hard.
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:Mm-hmm.
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:For a long time.
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:Mm-hmm.
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:For a long time I had to sit however I was
open to, what am I gonna learn from this?
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:Why is, you know, what is the reason that
this has come into my life right now?
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:Super
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:Speaker 2: powerful questions right there.
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:If you are somebody who is open to feeling
all of the emotions that come with any
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:sort of circumstance, that's probably one
of the most powerful questions you can ask
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:yourself is what can I learn from this?
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:Because it really like takes that
layer of fear off and it puts
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:you into like a curious space.
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:Mm-hmm.
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:It puts you into an inquisitive
space and you can't be afraid,
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:like you can't be in this.
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:Spiral of fear when your brain
is focused on the question, what
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:is there to learn from this?
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:Now, I'm not saying it can't quickly
shift back because it certainly can, but
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:when you intentionally focus your brain
on answering that question, you'll notice
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:how the vibration, the emotion changes.
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:Mm-hmm.
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:Then the actions follow suit.
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:Emotions drive our behaviors
or drive our actions.
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:So we will inherently change how
we're behaving when we change
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:how it is that we're feeling.
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:And we do have that control.
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:Most people have never been taught
how to change the way you feel.
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:They think that it's just like.
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:Like planted on us
because of a circumstance.
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:We lose a loved one and
we immediately feel sad.
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:And that really isn't true.
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:It isn't until we have a thought
that we actually feel something
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:somebody could have passed and
we wouldn't even know about it.
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:So that just debunks that
whole theory right there.
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:Until we have been told, and
we have a thought about it,
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:we won't have an emotion.
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:Speaker: Right?
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:Speaker 2: Circumstance actually
has very little to do with the
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:emotion that we're feeling.
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:It's a trigger for a thought.
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:And so therefore, the point is, is that.
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:We can control the way we think.
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:Now, I'm not saying when you're
in pain, you should shift your
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:focus so that you don't feel it.
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:I think like we just discussed,
pain has a ton of value.
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:You learn from it.
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:So if you can train yourself to allow
yourself to just sit in it, lean into
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:it, you'll be surprised at how much.
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:You learn, but that's the key is actually
allowing yourself to, to feel it.
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:Speaker: Exactly.
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:And I think, um, it just was so
eye-opening to me to go through
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:something that was so painful and scary.
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:It was really scary to me.
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:Um, and what I need to
say is that it hurt.
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:It was painful for a long time.
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:And, um, so even though I
kept, but, but what kept me.
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:Well, I, you know, I surrender.
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:I have my, my God, and I
surrendered everything to him.
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:And, and that truly was life changing.
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:Mm-hmm.
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:But I, I, but it wasn't like, you
know, I think that I had anticipated
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:with all the coaching that I had done,
well, I got this all figured out.
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:I can change my thought.
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:And you know what?
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:I couldn't do it that fast
and, and that was okay.
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:And so I don't want you to think.
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:If your husband just came home and
said, I want a divorce, or if your
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:kiddo's sick, or whatever it is,
I don't want you to think, oh, I
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:should be able to switch my mind.
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:I should be able to change this thought.
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:It's a little bit deeper than that.
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:Speaker 2: Yeah, I would try on
the thought of all I have to do
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:is allow the pain to be there.
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:That's the thought that
I would go with, and
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:Speaker: sometimes it's there for a
really long time and I mean, I would say.
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:Six months to a year almost.
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:I was kind of, well, six months
I was in feeling pretty painful,
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:feeling pretty, a lot of pain.
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:Um,
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:you know, and, and then I think about
like, and it still will creep up on me.
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:I mean, there are moments where I
will just get so overwhelmed that
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:I'll just get tears in my eyes,
like, what the heck just happened?
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:What did I go through?
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:Like I went through that.
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:What.
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:And so it's kind of like when
I think about that too, I think
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:about when you lose, like I have a
good friend who lost your husband.
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:It you, I mean, you can be thankful
that you had that beautiful
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:husband, but it's still gonna hurt.
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:It's that still pain is
that pain is gonna be there.
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:Speaker 3: Mm-hmm.
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:Speaker: Right?
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:And you can suffer less, but you can't
really get rid, you know what I'm saying?
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:Trace.
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:Yeah.
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:And I think that when I was kind of more
Suzy Sunshine and hadn't been through
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:a lot of hard things, I don't think I
understood the depth of that real pain.
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:And that, and that's why I think too, like
I can't stop doing di divorces because
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:I, and I know my pain was different.
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:I haven't been through a divorce,
but I've been through pain.
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:And I think divorces can be really
difficult and really painful.
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:Speaker 3: Mm-hmm.
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:And
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:Speaker: that's why I think if you're in
a Susie Sunshine moment, work on yourself.
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:I mean, because it is going to
save you when you like, learn
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:how to feel your feelings.
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:Mm-hmm.
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:Because it is going to save
you when you drop down into the
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:depths of something really hard.
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:Right.
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:It is going to, it, it was there, it
was there for me and I, and I, and it
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:didn't, it's honey, it did not feel good.
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:Right.
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:And I think I was always like, oh, I
want everyone to think I'm doing well.
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:Ha, I'm great.
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:You know?
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:No, it sucked.
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:It sucked.
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:And I did do really well because of the
choices that I made partly and partly
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:because of God and, and whatever.
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:And, and you know it, by the grace
of God it was caught early and, and
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:my, and so I did have things to grab
onto, but everybody has hope and.
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:Every, everything you're going
through, you do have something
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:to grab onto with gratitude.
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:Speaker 3: Mm-hmm.
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:And
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:Speaker: I think that's
what kept me alive.
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:And then just like I remember, I would
lay in bed and I would just try to
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:think of the things I'm grateful for.
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:They caught it early, it's cure,
you know, it's all these things.
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:And then, and then I would sit
there and I would just feel.
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:God's love.
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:Mm-hmm.
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:And sometimes I would have to go to
like when I felt love, like when you
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:hold your baby for the first time,
just go back there and feel that.
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:And then it kind of connected
me closer to how God loves me.
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:Speaker 3: Yeah.
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:Speaker: I don't know.
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:I mean, I'm just trying to throw this
stuff out here because I think the
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:self-coaching was so, meant so much to me.
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:But I think it's, there's more, I
mean, there's a lot of work in it.
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:Oh yeah.
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:And there was a lot of work in,
it's not just like, oh, just
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:do this, follow these steps.
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:It's not that, because I also
have to start thinking about when
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:did I think that the first time?
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:Because sometimes you, even though you
know a thought is ridiculous and you
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:almost don't believe it, 'cause it seems
so dumb, it is so ingrained in your head.
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:Mm-hmm.
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:You can't get over it.
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:Right.
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:Until you really do the deep work.
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:Speaker 2: Right?
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:Yeah.
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:And so just the neuroscience of it
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:Speaker: Yeah.
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:Can
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:Speaker 2: help normalize.
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:The experience.
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:So you're like, oh, I
know that's not even true.
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:Mm-hmm.
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:Like, I know I'm not going to die.
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:I know that I'm going to be okay,
but yet I can't shake this fear.
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:Speaker 3: Mm-hmm.
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:Speaker 2: And the whole reason
why you're even having that thought
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:that seems ridiculous is because
there is a neuro pathway mm-hmm.
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:That was established when you
were probably two years old.
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:Mm-hmm.
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:Your little primitive brain was always
out there scanning for danger, looking for
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:all of the ways you could potentially die.
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:And so that is very human of you.
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:And when you realize that just the
science of it, that alone can help you
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:normalize it and allow it to be there.
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:Mm-hmm.
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:Good.
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:The suffering that would happen
if you start to make it mean
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:something about your worth.
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:I shouldn't be feeling this way.
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:Yes, I should feel better.
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:This is so stupid that I
keep thinking that like.
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:Those aren't helpful thoughts.
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:Mm-hmm.
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:Right.
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:And that's what actually causes
the suffering is when you make
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:the pain mean something about
your worth or your balance.
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:Yes.
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:And so that is the very
distinct difference.
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:Yes.
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:Between pain and suffering that
I like to get right off of, you
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:know, right out of the gate.
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:I like to help people level
set that first and foremost.
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:Secondly, I would say self coaching.
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:Is an art that takes a lot of practice.
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:Mm-hmm.
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:Speaker 3: And
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:Speaker 2: that was the purpose
behind creating this planner, because
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:it takes you through the exercise
of self coaching every single day
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:with a very applicable like, um.
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:Dynamic, which happens to be your day.
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:There's a very applicable
element to your self-coaching.
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:The circumstance is your day,
and that helps people build
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:the muscle of self-coaching.
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:Now, when you get into the
extraordinary circumstances, like a
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:diagnosis or loss, I would recommend.
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:Reaching out for help.
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:Mm-hmm.
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:Getting a professional to coach
you because when you've layered
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:on maybe like the, um, I don't
know, just the inexperience of
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:self-coaching with adversity.
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:It's extraordinarily hard.
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:Mm-hmm.
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:But if you go and seek out coaching
from somebody who's been trained to
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:prompt you to, to like see your mind in
a different sort of way, things change.
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:So it's a big ask.
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:To your point, self-coaching
is, is not easy.
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:It is something that needs to be
practiced, but it's extraordinarily
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:difficult when you've layered on.
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:In unusual circumstance.
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:Speaker: Yeah.
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:Tracy, that is what has been so
eye-opening to me, and I think, I
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:mean, I am, I've been trained by you.
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:I am a coach.
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:Speaker 3: Mm-hmm.
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:Speaker: And I'm gonna, I'm
gonna be very, very honest here.
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:I dropped off the face of the
earth for a while and I need it to.
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:That was what I needed.
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:I and I, I did not get coaching, you know,
that I just said, uh, I need your prayers.
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:I need your prayers.
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:You know, and I would update you at my
little community that I would update.
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:And, um, and I, I don't know
if my way was right or wrong,
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:but you gotta do you right?
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:Yep.
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:Yep.
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:But this is what I'm saying
is that I need, I think I
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:need it like a year of rest.
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:I needed that because I'm, I'm quite
messed up if you didn't know that.
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:I'm like, I'm just learning
how to be me as we are.
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:Right?
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:Yes.
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:No, I'm just kidding.
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:I'm not that messed up, but, um.
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:I'm just learning how to have
fun, how to follow my dreams,
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:how to stop people pleasing.
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:And so I, I did, I took that time of rest.
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:I, but I, so I did not even
think about self-coaching.
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:I did not do a calendar.
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:I survived and, and I went back on
anxiety medication and that's okay.
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:'cause I was spinning out.
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:I was spinning out.
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:Now I've like weaned off.
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:Um, now I've come back to.
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:My passions, my dream,
and they mean even more.
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:Everything is just so much better now.
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:Speaker 2: Yeah, I do wanna clarify.
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:I don't think self coaching is the
end all be all, or even coaching,
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:like professional coaching is
the end all, be all solution.
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:There are lots of resources out there like
medications or like your spiritual faith,
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:like there are a lot of different avenues
that you can go and you could take.
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:Hybrid of all of 'em, you know, so, um,
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:Speaker: well, and I don't
wanna downplay the value of it.
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:This is what, like, I highly recommend.
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:I mean, we all go through hard
things like we think, like not
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:talking to our sister is hard.
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:Well wait till you're like faced
with something like, I might die.
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:And then you're gonna be like, oh, okay,
maybe I don't really care about that.
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:I'm gonna focus on this.
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:Right?
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:So I just wanna.
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:I totally believe in it for everyone
because even though I'm telling
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:you I didn't reach out for coaching
during that time, I know that
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:because I had practiced it and it
was part of me that it was in there.
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:But I just, because of my life, I just
needed that rest for a little while.
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:Mm-hmm.
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:And now.
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:I need the coaching back.
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:Mm-hmm.
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:I need the deadlines, I need my calendar.
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:And so I finally started do, I
didn't do a calendar the whole time.
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:I mean, I just said that,
but I, and, and that's okay.
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:Speaker 2: Yeah, I, I wanna just challenge
you on your thought around, I didn't
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:do any self-coaching during that time.
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:Right?
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:It's like, okay, well how do
you define self-coaching and
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:how do I define self-coaching?
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:Speaker: Right?
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:Speaker 2: I define self-coaching as.
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:Literally getting in touch with my
thoughts and making decisions about
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:what it is that I'm gonna believe.
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:That's what I consider self-coaching.
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:Some other people would say, you're not
self-coaching unless you have this book.
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:And you make specific decisions about
your day, how it is that you wanna
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:think and feel, and about where it
is that you're gonna be doing and
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:what it is you're gonna be doing.
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:Doing at that moment, like there are
different definitions, and when I hear
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:you replay what it is that you went
through over the course of six months
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:to a year, I hear you saying that
you did make decisions about how it
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:was that you were to think and feel.
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:You decided to hand it over to God.
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:That's a decision.
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:That's a belief.
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:That created peace.
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:That created comfort.
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:Speaker: It's so interesting
because when you first responded,
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:I thought, and I'm like, holy crap.
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:It was like self-coaching one.
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:Oh, I mean, through the whole thing
on steroids, all I did was self-coach.
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:Mm-hmm.
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:So isn't that interesting?
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:Yeah.
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:Even though I wasn't
sitting down doing the.
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:The whole thing was about reevaluating,
getting in touch with my feelings, um,
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:learning what was important to me, and
looking at why, why did this happen?
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:Like, let's just take a, this is a,
a nice, when you have a stage one
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:that they catch and cure, that's a
little wake up call that's a little.
444
:What's going on in your life that,
you know, that would bring that on?
445
:And I think that's so interesting.
446
:And, and I don't know for sure what
it is, but I've got some, I've got
447
:some really strong inklings mm-hmm.
448
:On what it is.
449
:So,
450
:Speaker 2: yeah.
451
:Yeah, yeah.
452
:I, um, I also think that you
probably wouldn't have been in
453
:the same place had you not had.
454
:The skill sets on the onset, like
455
:Speaker: never, never.
456
:Speaker 2: Who had invested so much
time, energy, resources into creating
457
:that skill that you were ready.
458
:It just looked different when under
different circumstances or under that
459
:veil of the diagnosis, the practice.
460
:Looked different.
461
:Speaker: Okay.
462
:And this is, thank you.
463
:I think this is what I wanna say.
464
:I want everyone to learn how to do
self coaching and do the mind math.
465
:You know, work with Tracy, do whatever
you can, because I think that's what
466
:made all the difference, I think.
467
:I think it was like it was
bringing me to the point where
468
:I would be ready to truly heal.
469
:Mm-hmm.
470
:Like I truly heal so many aspects.
471
:Not, you know, not just healing
the, the cancer, but healing.
472
:The healing me.
473
:All
474
:Speaker 2: emotional.
475
:Speaker: Yeah.
476
:Yes.
477
:But I never would've been there.
478
:I never, Tracy, I.
479
:I was so afraid and such a victim
and so judgy and all the work we
480
:did lots of good work, didn't we?
481
:Mm-hmm.
482
:Speaker 3: Mm-hmm.
483
:Oh,
484
:Speaker: man.
485
:I mean, the, the training I went through
with you, um, uh, you know, all the
486
:things to, to just make me ready for it
and, you know, that's what I, I think
487
:that's maybe what I want people to know.
488
:Speaker 3: Like,
489
:Speaker: yes, enjoy your life and
don't sit there and go, oh my gosh,
490
:something horrible's around the corner.
491
:Maybe it never is.
492
:Right?
493
:But it'll help you live a better life.
494
:Speaker 2: Right.
495
:And I wouldn't, I personally, I
wouldn't look at it as like an
496
:insurance policy, like I have to do
this in case something tragic happens.
497
:I wouldn't look at it that way.
498
:I would actually look at it as.
499
:The means to better understanding myself.
500
:Mm-hmm.
501
:Like, look at how you've come
out of this, like, you so much
502
:better understand yourself.
503
:And that's what self
coaching is truly all about.
504
:Mm-hmm.
505
:Yes.
506
:It's the, the outcome is making decisions
ahead of time so that you feel in
507
:control, but the path to getting there.
508
:Is through better understanding yourself.
509
:Mm-hmm.
510
:So if you are somebody right now
who feels very out of sorts, very
511
:out of touch, very confused about
your life and who you are, yeah.
512
:Self-coaching is a great solution.
513
:If you are somebody who is.
514
:Saying, I don't know how I would
ever handle that kind of diagnosis.
515
:Self-coaching right now is a great
option for you, so it serves you in a
516
:lot of ways, but I certainly wouldn't
do it as that insurance policy.
517
:Yeah, I would do it as a means of
better understanding yourself because
518
:it really does make your life so
much more abundant when you can
519
:have these ongoing conversations
with yourself and really kind.
520
:Be present and think through
the different experiences.
521
:It, it does make life more
abundant and more enjoy it.
522
:Does.
523
:Speaker: I, I don't know
who, who, it would not be for
524
:Speaker 2: neither.
525
:I mean, I, I feel like,
526
:Speaker: I mean, really
like everyone, everyone.
527
:That's what I, I guess that's
what I'm trying to say.
528
:I really feel, um.
529
:I just really wanna share that
with people, how much it helped me.
530
:And if you can, you know, sign up
with Tracy and, or, or just listen to
531
:the podcast on your mindset and, and
just, I guess the bottom line is feel
532
:your feelings and don't judge 'em.
533
:Have empathy for yourself.
534
:Speaker 2: Right.
535
:Yeah, the judging of your own feelings
is what creates the suffering, period.
536
:Yeah.
537
:And then we'll link the goal planner
because it's truly a day planner that
538
:is helping you set and achieve goals.
539
:That you, that are meaningful
for you in your life.
540
:And, um, we have free workshops that
will help you maximize that planner.
541
:Anybody could buy it today off of
Amazon and figure out how to use it.
542
:But, um, why do that when you can
watch a workshop and have me hold your
543
:hand through the way to maximize it?
544
:Speaker: Well, and what I wanna
say, Tracy and I told you this
545
:in our last get together, but.
546
:So I, I need that
because I have big goals.
547
:I have big things coming, you
know, which is super exciting.
548
:'cause I always say Colonel
Sanders started at 65.
549
:Yep.
550
:I'm not that old yet.
551
:No.
552
:So I'm really excited for those things.
553
:But this is, this is the ticket is
that before Easter I used, I mean
554
:I used your work, this book, and I.
555
:I thought I was intentional, but what,
what do I wanna get out of the state?
556
:And I'm like the people pleaser who was
always worried about what people think.
557
:And I thought, you know, what,
what could, what do I want?
558
:And I thought, I wanna go to
Easter and I want to love ev.
559
:I just wanna love everyone
and not, and not judge 'em.
560
:And I wanna be interested in them,
and I wanna, and I don't wanna be
561
:worried about me and how I appear
and I wanna go and I sit down and
562
:connect and I, I actually rehearsed it.
563
:I think Joe Dispenza said, or
whatever, said something about
564
:this, like rehearsed it in my head.
565
:Yeah.
566
:Yeah.
567
:And it was magic.
568
:And do you know how much that meant to me?
569
:Because those are things I
never even thought about.
570
:This isn't just about professional, it is.
571
:But it's also about, do you know
what a great Easter I had and do
572
:you know the ripple effect that me.
573
:Connecting with other
people, had on other people.
574
:Right, right.
575
:I mean, that's what it's all about.
576
:Speaker 2: Yeah.
577
:It has unlimited applications.
578
:This applies to your professional life,
to the relationships in your life, to your
579
:health and wellness, to your finances.
580
:I mean, it's, it's truly unlimited
when, and, and it's so simple.
581
:It is so simple.
582
:It may not be easy, but the simplicity
of it is seriously picking three
583
:events from any given day, and we
take you day by day by day, and I ask
584
:you to pick three events that you're
gonna make a decision ahead of time.
585
:I wanna underscore that a decision ahead
of time, not about where you're gonna be
586
:and what it is that you're gonna be doing.
587
:I don't care about that.
588
:Any goal planner will have you
write that into the blank line.
589
:I'm asking you to make a decision
about how it is that you want to feel.
590
:Mm-hmm.
591
:While you are.
592
:Executing on that event, you guys,
it is a game changer because it will
593
:require you to decide what it is
that you would have to be believing.
594
:And now the like, the effort is
focused on, how do I remember that?
595
:Because once you decide it, so if you've
decided that three hours before the
596
:Easter event and now you find yourself
at the Easter event, it's super important
597
:that you like squeeze the value out of
the work that you did three hours ago.
598
:And you remember how was it
that I wanted to think and feel?
599
:Speaker 3: Mm-hmm.
600
:Speaker 2: So that's, that becomes
the quote unquote hard part.
601
:And we have all sorts of
little hacks for that.
602
:But as you get better at doing
this exercise, it becomes easier
603
:because you've become grounded
uhhuh in your own decisions.
604
:And so at any moment when you start
to feel like the uneasiness or the
605
:confusion, that becomes the indicator to
remember the work that you did earlier.
606
:Speaker: Amen, sister.
607
:And that is what it was like
I was, that I was present.
608
:So I went to Easter and I walked in.
609
:And then if I was going back to the
old Lisa where I was like, um, I
610
:don't know if she likes the way I'm
dressed, or, you know, whatever your
611
:stupid thought you're ha I don't know.
612
:That's the what, where I go.
613
:I went, oh no.
614
:That's not what I wanna
be focused on today.
615
:Speaker 3: There you
616
:Speaker: go.
617
:And it, it was like, and it, and
so, and you are right because it's
618
:not hard for me to remember anymore
because I am on the alert to recognize
619
:those feelings that I don't want.
620
:Speaker 2: Right.
621
:Right?
622
:Yeah.
623
:Yeah.
624
:And it just takes practice, you know?
625
:And you're not going to buy the book
and all of a sudden be perfect at it.
626
:You're gonna buy the book and you're
gonna fumble your way through the
627
:first few weeks, and it's gonna feel
awkward because nobody ever taught
628
:you how to decide ahead of time how
it is that you wanna think and feel.
629
:But you're gonna get better at it, and
you're gonna get so good at it that
630
:you'll find yourself in the moment.
631
:Of any circumstance, feeling an
unwanted feeling and remembering
632
:I don't have to feel this way.
633
:Mm-hmm.
634
:It's completely within my control, and
that right there is the definition of a
635
:self-made person is when you remember.
636
:Mm-hmm.
637
:I don't have to feel this way.
638
:I certainly can.
639
:I'm sure that there would be
value at a gift and an opportunity
640
:from any of these circumstances.
641
:Mm-hmm.
642
:But you decide, right?
643
:You get to decide.
644
:Speaker: Amen.
645
:Amen.
646
:And it's so important.
647
:I never ever invested in
myself until I started working
648
:with you like two years ago.
649
:People, it's not that big of an
investment to just start with the planner.
650
:Now I really invest in myself now.
651
:It is really important to me and
still have a long way to go, but you.
652
:Are the most important thing, and
God wants to use you to do his work.
653
:So if you're not loving yourself and
feeding yourself, you can't do all
654
:the good work you're here to do so,
655
:Speaker 2: right.
656
:Yeah.
657
:That's why we called the planner
becoming self-made, because
658
:it's a never ending journey.
659
:Oh, right.
660
:You're always on the
path of becoming right.
661
:You're always learning
something about yourself.
662
:There is never going to be that.
663
:Finish line of perfection.
664
:Yep.
665
:It's always, you're always in the
state and we want people to embrace
666
:and celebrate the state of becoming.
667
:Speaker: I love it.
668
:I love it because I'm still
becoming, but it still, it still
669
:keeps just getting more beautiful.
670
:So Tracy, thank you.
671
:Thank you so much for being here.
672
:I'm gonna have you back on, we'll
talk about more stuff, alright.
673
:But find her in the show notes,
listeners, or go to self-made you.
674
:Thanks, Tracy.
675
:You take good care.
676
:I'll see you next week.
677
:Okay.
678
:Take care.
679
:Speaker 2: Bye-bye.
680
:Speaker: Bye.