Saddle Up Segment: Embracing Imperfect Parenting with Love & Grace

Speaker: 00:00:01

Welcome listeners.

2

: 00:00:03

I am so thankful you're here.

3

: 00:00:05

I am excited to bring

you on my walk today.

4

: 00:00:08

You may not see that if you're

listening to this podcast.

5

: 00:00:12

You are listening to the Saddle

Up segment, and this is where

6

: 00:00:19

I use it for several reasons.

7

: 00:00:21

So you know, I do the Doing

Divorce different podcast.

8

: 00:00:23

It comes out on Tuesday.

9

: 00:00:25

Days and this past week we talked

to to some lovely attorneys.

10

: 00:00:29

We talked a lot about parenting

through divorce, but this

11

: 00:00:32

is what I want you to know.

12

: 00:00:34

My podcast is for women, and it's not

just for women who are divorcing, it's for

13

: 00:00:41

women who are going through hard times.

14

: 00:00:43

So.

15

: 00:00:45

If you are going through something

difficult, um, like a bad diagnosis

16

: 00:00:52

or some trouble with your kids, so.

17

: 00:00:55

It's more than just about doing

divorce different, it's about

18

: 00:00:58

doing divorce different, it's

about doing life different.

19

: 00:01:02

It's about living your best life.

20

: 00:01:04

So today I just wanna recap a little bit.

21

: 00:01:08

Tuesday you gotta go.

22

: 00:01:09

Listen, it's, they're, these ladies

are darling and we had a lot of fun.

23

: 00:01:12

Um, and it was a little bit different,

you know, to have two guests.

24

: 00:01:15

And we talked about parenting.

25

: 00:01:17

And so then I thought about a

story, and so this parenting applies

26

: 00:01:21

to you if you're going through a

divorce or if you're just a parent.

27

: 00:01:27

So here's, here's my little story.

28

: 00:01:30

When I was a young mom, um, and woo, it

was, you know, so important to me to,

29

: 00:01:36

to do everything correct and so, you

know, just so mommy, mommy, well, my

30

: 00:01:44

son Jack, I was always, I always wanted

Jack to feel confident and I knew that.

31

: 00:01:48

He was a kid that wanted

to be near his mama.

32

: 00:01:52

And so when we were like in a store, I

would just always be really reassuring.

33

: 00:01:56

I'm right here, sweetheart.

34

: 00:01:58

I'm here for you.

35

: 00:01:59

And you know, so he wouldn't be afraid.

36

: 00:02:01

So then one day my husband

and I went together.

37

: 00:02:03

You know, we did this a lot.

38

: 00:02:04

Like we were at Target.

39

: 00:02:06

He had Jack, I had Abby, and all of

a sudden I watch and I'm a little

40

: 00:02:12

bit further down a different aisle.

41

: 00:02:15

My husband leaves Jack in an aisle

and goes to a different aisle,

42

: 00:02:21

and then I hear Jack crying.

43

: 00:02:23

I, I go running and I said,

John, what are you doing?

44

: 00:02:27

Like, we don't want Jack to be

scared that we're not there.

45

: 00:02:31

And my husband said, oh.

46

: 00:02:33

He goes, well, I thought.

47

: 00:02:35

If I just went around the corner and he

could get a little scared and then see

48

: 00:02:39

that I was right there, that that would

be, um, that would build his confidence.

49

: 00:02:45

I was like, are you kidding me?

50

: 00:02:47

So here's the thing, you guys, even when

you parent together in a marriage, you

51

: 00:02:54

both parent different and that's okay.

52

: 00:02:58

It's okay because each of them

does have something to bring.

53

: 00:03:02

So I know it's hard if you were

married to an asshole and it's

54

: 00:03:08

really hard to parent with them.

55

: 00:03:10

I always tell my clients, as

long as your kids have one

56

: 00:03:15

healthy parent that they can see.

57

: 00:03:17

Who, and you're not perfect.

58

: 00:03:18

You're just a healthy parent.

59

: 00:03:20

Taking care of yourself, taking

care of your kids, that's enough.

60

: 00:03:24

And here's another thing, don't be

so worried if your kids are getting

61

: 00:03:30

parented different by your expo.

62

: 00:03:33

You can let it go, I promise you they will

be okay and they will become resilient.

63

: 00:03:39

And we all parent different and

we all have different ideas.

64

: 00:03:42

So I just want you to, I just wanna make

things less scary because that is one

65

: 00:03:48

thing that I have learned in my life

and you know, I've surrendered to God.

66

: 00:03:52

So that's the biggest thing.

67

: 00:03:54

But the one most important

thing that I've learned is that.

68

: 00:03:59

Sometimes we make things a lot

scarier than we need to, and I don't

69

: 00:04:04

want that for you because that's

no way to live a happy, fun life.

70

: 00:04:07

And I'm sorry, I just realized I

was carrying my phone at an angle.

71

: 00:04:13

So if you're watching this.

72

: 00:04:14

On YouTube that may have happened.

73

: 00:04:16

If not, I just want you to know I still

appreciate you being here for this

74

: 00:04:20

little tidbit, you know where I recap

Tuesday's episode and just give you some

75

: 00:04:25

little things that can help you in life.

76

: 00:04:27

So hang in there.

77

: 00:04:28

Thanks for joining me.